


I demand to speak with the person in charge here

by ko_writes



Series: Cabin Pressure Prompts [16]
Category: Cabin Pressure
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-05
Updated: 2015-01-05
Packaged: 2018-03-05 14:17:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3123272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ko_writes/pseuds/ko_writes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One or more MJN crew members demands to meet the writer. They have a list of complaints and would like to see immediate action or else there will be a strike.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I demand to speak with the person in charge here

John: Can I help you?  
  
Carolyn: Mr Finnemore, we have a few complaints.  
  
John: Really?  
  
Martin: Yes! I have a LOT of complaints!  
  
Arthur: The show is... well, brilliant; but there are a few things...  
  
John: Like what?  
  
Carolyn: Making me into a tyrant in Abu Dhabi, and implying that I always have daggers looming over their heads.  
  
Douglas: Making the cat scram poor Arthur.  
  
Martin: Making me look like an idiot, and whiney, and basically antagonising and bullying me.  
  
Arthur: And freezing the cat -  
  
Douglas: I don't really care about the cat.  
  
Carolyn: And that's just Abu Dhabi. Boston was a bad one for Martin and Arthur.  
  
Arthur: I killed someone!  
  
Martin: I was partly responsible for man-slaughter then tackled and arrested by security personnel!  
  
Douglas: We're going to miss a few because, frankly, there's not enough time. We're just going to pick out the cruellest bits. Alcoholic with three divorces and a child I never get to see.  
  
Carolyn: I'm twice divorced and running a failing airdot to avoid being regarded as a little old lady.  
  
Martin: In no particular order; I don't get paid, I live on pasta and bread with the odd baked potato, I've only ever been out with four people, I'm short but played by a tall actor (Not fair!), I have to run a removals business on the side, your comments about my hair (which is GINGER, thank you! Not pink!), I stutter, I make a fool out of myself on a regular basis, all the ground crew hate me, I cry easily, I sprained my ankle showing someone how not to sprain their ankle, the Goose smoothie, the travelling lemon taped to my hat - I could go on but I'm going to faint - Oh! The inner ear thing in Ipswich! *Breaks off gasping*  
  
Douglas: Better?  
  
Martin: *Gasping* Much...  
  
Arthur: Gordon Shappey as my dad. He's... not brilliant...  
  
Carolyn: He verbally abuses you - I'd say vile.  
  
John: ... I'm so sorry.   
  
Douglas: We have some changes we want to make.  
  
John: Yes?  
  
Carolyn: MJN to become more successful so we can pay Martin.  
  
Martin: Douglas getting a new, long term partner who will treat him right and care and love him.  
  
Douglas: Gordon Shappey arrested so that we know he's out of the picture forever.  
  
Arthur: And a brilliant ending!  
  
John: And if not?  
  
Douglas: We strike.  
  
John: ... Alright, consider it done.  
  
Carolyn: Thank you. Come along, Team somewhat-less-useless.  
  
Martin: I'll catch up with you in a minute...  
  
*Door closes*  
  
Martin: Douglas' new partner must be ginger with freckles and a nice Captain's uniform who loves and respects Douglas and they get on very well.  
  
John: How did I know that was coming?

**Author's Note:**

> Please review :)


End file.
